Me?
Your Autumn Test Results
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You are a dynamic, vibrant person. You aren't afraid to pursue your passions.
When you are happiest, you are calm. You appreciate tradition and family. You enjoy feeling cozy.
You tend to be afraid of change. You are never ready for things to be different.
You find love to be the most comforting thing in the world. You feel at peace when you're with your loved ones.
Your ideal day is active and full. You like to keep busy with your favorite things, and you appreciate a routine.
You tend to live in the moment. You enjoy whatever is going on, and you don't obsess over the past or future.
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What Your Bed Says About You
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Outward appearances are a concern of yours, but not your primary concern. You try to take care of yourself and your home, but it's not an obsession.
You try to be an organized person, but you often fall behind. Certain parts of your life tend to fall into chaos.
You are very high maintenance. You like everything a certain way, and you're grumpy if things aren't the way you like them.
In relationships, you tend to be quite dominant. You enjoy taking charge.
You tend to be a down to earth, practical person. You think in terms of what is actual.
You are a total homebody. You are happiest when you're at home.
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Your Personality at 35,000 Says...
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Deep down, you vastly prefer being with others to being alone. You love to engage people in conversation.
You are good with your place in the world. You are confident and comfortable with who you are.
Your gift is relating to other people. You don't hide from your own emotions, and you are good at drawing other people out.
You are inspired by what is possible. Real life is often too ordinary for you.
It's very easy for you to feel happy. You can find peace with any situation.
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One Down
Our research presentation is finally over. Now all I have to do is get over another 3 hurdles - case presentation, treatment planning and a written paper and I'm
free.
Have seemed to have lost my motivation this couple of days. All I want to do is lie in bed and sleep.
Back to work.
Labels: Dental School
Deletion
I believe that everything in life happens for a reason - that every person that I meet, every decision that I make and everything that has happened to me shaped the person that I am today and the person I will be in the future.
I think the things that impact us the most are the people we meet. And sometimes when I think about it I wish I never met certain people, that I didn't know they existed. For good reasons and wrong reasons.
How do you delete a person from your life? If only it was as easy as clicking a delete button and purging everything to do with that person out of your memory and your life. Everywhere I go different things remind me of certain people - certain events. Even certain subjects are cloaked with the person's presence because it was stuff you used to talk about, laugh about or make fun of. I guess at the end of the day the person has become a part of you in a way, because without that person's presence in your life, you wouldn't be who you are right now.
How do you learn to forget?
You don't.
Sometimes bittersweet memories are meant to be what they are - a mixture of emotions. At the end of the day perhaps the best thing to do is to just try to remember the sweet fondly and take the bitterness as a life lesson.
I was broken, but I have been made whole again.
Labels: Ramblings
When Will This End?
I made up my notes for my 4th year exams and studied just what I made up - and managed to get through it just fine.
This year when I look at them I can't believe I had the nerve to just go into the exams with that little knowledge in my mind. Thus, been adding additional notes to everything and although I've been doing it for the past couple of weeks the things to add seems unending!
It's times like this that I wish that notes would magically write themselves and just by touching textbooks knowledge will infuse into my brain through osmosis.
If only!
Labels: Dental School
Wishlist
Haven't been making many wishlists lately. However, these are a few things that would serve me well.
1.
A new computer - No offense to my current iBook G3 (Yes, 3!!! To illustrate how old it is!!) but I don't think it can physically keep up with the things I want to do. This blog is devoid of pictures because to upload photos and edit them is just too much for this computer to handle. Am looking forward to getting a new one.
2.
Luggage - A nice overnight sort of bag thingie would be good for my trips back to Melbourne next year. Well, that's what I think I would be doing anyway. Who knows? I might love country life so much I might not want to leave.
3.
A Cavalier Spaniel - Still undecided if I should make that 10 year commitment and get a dog. I guess it's because I'm not sure what's going to happen in the next 10 years. Been thinking a lot about this.
4.
Flatware - Am currently eating with forks and spoons that are not firmly attached to their handles. It is
not a pleasant experience to be eating cereal halfway and then realizing your spoon has fallen into the milk.
5.
TablewareAll very expensive things. Have to prioritize wisely.
Labels: Lists
Snippits of the Past
Browsed through my old blogs and realized that the person I was 4 years ago and the person I am now are two completely different people.
The person I was 4 years ago was perpetually depressed. Half my posts are about how I can't get out of bed and I hate my life. I have no idea how I lived like that.
I found this post after 9 months of living with that housemate from hell in my 3rd year. I read it now and I am brought back to the time where I felt so bad I could not even get out of bed.
For 9 months I endured everything from stolen peanut butter, missing toothbrushes, stolen towels, dirty kitchen, missing scarf without really snapping.
Sure, I snapped when my scarf disappeared. More like collapsed and couldn't get out of bed for an entire weekend. But now the small things are really getting to me. In short, I'm going crazy. Seriously.
I left a huge hostile note telling my housemate to &*(#@*)@ shut the microwave oven after using. It's one of my pet peeves. Hostile note also informed her to CLEAN UP AFTER HERSELF after she spills whatever she spills in the microwave.
Am I a demanding person? Is it a huge demand??
She heeded the note for a grand total of three days. WOW.
Doesn't help that a box of tissue paper (the only thing that isn't under lock and key in my room) that I left in the living room has mysteriously disappeared.
What have I done to deserve this? Is it because there's things that I'm doing that aggravates her and she's doing things like this on purpose to piss me off?
Is this karmic retribution for...oh, I don't know - not volunteering for charity or something? Being a little bit mean to a couple of people? Being me? WHAT? WHAT?
WHAT?!?!?!?!??!?!!??!?!?
Do I have to reconcile with all the people in the past? Do I have to forgive everybody? Do I have to be nicer to my patients? What have I done to deserve this? This is punishment isn't it? Because if it isn't WHY ME?!?!?!?!!
Going crazy. Seriously - my sanity is on the line. Can't take a lot of this anymore.
I can read this post and laugh now but the truth is that at that point in time I was actually semi-suicidal.
Am grateful that part of my life is officially over.
L.M. Montgomery
Met another fan of L.M. Montgomery over the weekend. Spent the next half an hour excitedly talking about our favourite books and characters while the other people at the table wondered what was so great.
Blue Castle is probably my all time favourite. Highly recommended to anyone who craves a happy ending, yet at the same time have a good cry in the middle of the book.
Am procrastinating - avoiding study time. Much rather surf the net for homewares.
Labels: Ramblings
Dreamt that I had a cavity on my 47D and was frantically trying to remineralize it with ToothMousse the entire night.
Been eating a block of Cadbury Fruit and Nut - the only thing preventing me from finishing the entire block off right now is the fact that my palate and tongue have been subjected to trauma from the nuts in the chocolate.
Also have been revisiting old worship songs. Very nostalgic. Reminds me of the time I was still 13, giggling with church friends after service and all the teenage love dramas. Dramas generally centered around the fact that nobody was allowed to date - therefore there was lots of sneaking around and chain phone-calling.
Sigh.
Labels: Dental School, Life
Scrabble
Relived my passion for Scrabble last night when I should have been studying stacks of Perio notes.
There's something about trying to form the longest word possible while scoring bonus points that really motivates me to use my brain - the way Perio notes don't.
This brought me back to the days in Second Year when I was playing Literati on Yahoo! Games every half an hour or so after reading through one lecture because I needed a 'break'.
Anyway, it's time to truly pull my socks up and study 'for real'. After that - wheee!
Labels: Life
Revelation
In 3 weeks, everything is over!!
So near yet so far.
Labels: Life
Warm and Fuzzy
It was the last patient of the day and I just wanted to
go home. Mainly because I was having menstrual cramps and it had been a long day.
Finished off a 11 palatal filling and asked the patient if it felt fine. Patient then decided to tell me that she wanted me to widen the tooth so that I could close the gap between that tooth and her denture.
Decided to be nice even though it was a purely cosmetic procedure, it was already late, she really should have told me about it before I started rather than at the end and I was in pain. Proceeded to add on some resin composite on the mesial to make it prettier.
The result was lovely. Patient was so happy she hugged me and kissed me on the cheek.
And that is why I love doing anterior resin composites.
Labels: Dental School, Life
Feeling uneasy. Very uneasy.
:S
Have suddenly realized that the header of my blog isn't showing up.
May have not been showing up for a few months now for all I know because I rarely look at my blog itself.
Problem is all my blog things are all in a thumb drive that I cannot find, and have not been able to find for the past 4 months.
I guess my blog is just going to be headerless until I find it.
Labels: Life
Tea For None
My teacup from my teaset was broken yesterday. It somehow fell out of the drying rack and ended up on the floor, in pieces.
I guess in a way I feel sorry - I did like my little teaset. However, the one comfort that I have is that I get to buy a new one.
Been browsing but have yet to meet 'the' teaset. Will persevere.
Labels: Life
Once Again
About one and a half years ago I was seized with an intense desire to own a dog. A Blenhiem King Charles Cavalier Spaniel to be precise. But when I talked to my parents they were a brick wall. They said
no.
Dogs are dirty, you don't have time, you don't
really want a dog, you're a student not a dog carer etc.
In retrospect they were wise - there was no way I could have taken care of a dog properly over this past one and a half years. However, as a new chapter of my life approaches, I believe I
can take care of a dog should I choose to get one next year.
Seriously considering getting one in December. I'm just not sure if it's the right thing to do.
Hmm...
Labels: Obsessions
A Real Gentleman
"A gentleman never stands a lady up" - Will from Questionable Content
That said after he got run over by a truck.
Awwwwwww.....
Labels: My Favourite Things
Missed the last train home.
Birds pass by to tell me that I'm not alone.
Well I'm pushing myself to finish this part,
I can handle a lot,
But one thing I'm missing is in your eyes. Eyes - Rogue WaveI dreamt of you again last night. Will I ever get over you?
Rriiaooww!
Been really grumpy.
Can't wait for exams to be over!
Labels: Life
Human Nature
No matter how hard I try to be a better person once in a while I still feel twinges of resentment, anger and aggravation. I can't help it.
Which is why I generally try to snap out of such thoughts when I start heading down that path because it's honestly just not worth it - I get nothing out of it but miserable feelings.
Had a mid-day nap that lasted 3 hours. Been getting headaches these few days and just the general feeling of not wanting to wake up. Once I'm in bed I just do not want to get out of it.
On a cheerful note, in less than 4 weeks dental school will be behind me forever - the pre-requisite being that I pass, of course. Lots of my time is spent fantasizing about that glorious, glorious day.
Labels: Life, Ramblings
If there was a highly selective bomb and it would kill either everyone you love, or the rest of the world, who would you pick?
If your dream girl/guy appeared in flesh but wore full dentures, would you go out with the person?
Labels: Ramblings
Research
Spent a good hour at least trying to get the
perfect Powerpoint presentation template for our research presentation. Finally decided on what we thought looked earnest yet at the same time, full of symbolisms related to our project.
Discussing things with schoolmates now invariable leads into mini panic attacks. Everyone seems to know
everything.
Stress.
Labels: Dental School
Tuesday, 14th of October, 2008
Woke up at 11am and proceeded to microwave leftovers from yesterday. Then decided that having no snacks in the house was unacceptable and had to rectify the situation by baking some blueberry rosewater cupcakes.
Currently baking at the rate of 3-4 batches of cupcakes a week.
Very bad.
Then decided to watch Dr Phil. And Oprah.
In dire need to go grocery shopping but can't seem to drag myself out of the house.
Labels: Life, Ramblings
The Little Things...
Things that have been keeping me fascinated this week:
1. Silicon Molds - Not the ones that don't work, but the ones that actually really
are non-stick. I recommend Pyrex. Quite miraculous. Makes cleanup a breeze and saves on paper cupcake liners.
2. Steam irons.
3. eTag for Citylink.
Labels: My Favourite Things
October Evening
As I stood on the balcony of my apartment, watching the sky slowly turn from blue to orange and finally black - and watching apartment lights turning on one by one in the neighbouring apartment block I realized how grateful I am to be in Melbourne.
In times like this I forget that I only have 4 weeks to exams and enjoy life for what it is.
Feeling peace.
Labels: Life
Taps
Sudden realization that I've been taking taps that have the hot and cold water incorporated into one single tap for granted.
Was forced to use a double tapped sink recently and had lots of trouble trying to inch it to the right temperature.
I love single taps.
Labels: Ramblings
Strawberry Cupcake
One of the joys of being sent to work in Douta Galla is the fact that it's so near to a couple of fruit shops.
Really cheap fruit shops.
Saw some strawberries for only $1.25 a punnet and could not resist. Buying strawberries always seemed like a gamble to me - one never knows if it's going to be nice and sweet or sour. Anyway, these turned out fine and I decided to bake some strawberry cupcakes with them.
Turned out really well, even if I do say so myself.
Labels: Food
Diamonds, Dates and Dreams
As I sat there telling the guy I have loved for years that his indifference towards me was killing me and I couldn't take it anymore - he turned around and said he has been feeling the same way for the past few years, but had been too afraid of the future to do anything.
As he announced to his family that I was
the one, the family members immediately opposed his insane idea but the next thing I know we were walking down the aisle towards what looked like happily ever after.
He took out a ring and then proceeded to tell me that it was the product of many sacrifices so that he could give what was his life to his wife - then someone appeared and said that diamond had a fatal flaw and therefore it was worth mere pennies.
Confusion at the alter.
As that scene dissolved into nothingness another dream formed. I was going to watch Wicked with a date. As we promised to meet up I said I thought he had already watched it. He then said he had, but not with me.
Woke up with a start.
They were vivid dreams.
Labels: Life
Pride, Patience and Pain
Have had lots of opportunities to cultivate patience this week, particularly in community clinic.
Having done a recent bible study on that very topic, I tried to keep all the principles. For example, one should have patience when the situation can't be changed e.g. suction will only work when it's placed a certain way. Or when a person can't be changed. Or when life just doesn't seem very
fair.
Anyway, the way to be patient is to just
go with the flow and replace feelings of irritation with laughter.
Managed to limp along to a certain extent but came home to be faced with extreme pain on the left hand side of my face. Could not locate source of pain. Was it odontogenic? Sinusitis? Random stress-induced pain? Concluded it was probably the latter.
Anyway.
I'm quite tired of people who seem to think that they are invincible. At least have the decency to fake humility if you don't have it.
Scratch the above sentence - I shouldn't be complaining.
Labels: Ramblings
Bad Habits
Have not cooked for a long time.
Things I've been eating the past week:
1.
Cake. Lots of cake. Self baked as well as non-self baked.
2.
Lattes. I used to be perfectly happy not drinking coffee but nowadays it's beginning to become more and more of a habit to just order one when I'm out.
3.
KFC. Wicked wing snackboxes.
4.
Norsiah's. A Malaysian/Singaporean place that serves all kinds of Malay style food. Am positively addicted to their fried drumsticks, rendang and sambal egg.
Am aware that should stop self-destructive habits but just can't seem to do so.
Reached a new low point in my life when I stood in the shower and suddenly had the desire to scrub the bathroom tiles with a toothbrush to get rid of grot. Yes, I kid you not. When I rather clean the bathroom than study, you know things are getting serious.
So now I have a semi-sparkling clean bathroom (will continue grot scrubbing in the next shower), a mouthful of apthous ulcers and several stacks of unstudied notes.
Yes, I'm going
slightly insane.
Labels: Food
An Afternoon In The Park
Went out for a long lazy lunch with a friend I haven't met for ages.
After stuffing myself silly with an apple and rhubarb pie, we headed to the local playground. The scene was idyllic - children on see saws, moms and dads playing with their kids, and a labrador puppy frolicking, relishing his first day ever out in the park. He was only 8 and a half weeks old.
Sat there and didn't want to leave. Ever.
However as the afternoon wore on nagging thoughts about study crept into my mind and with a heavy heart, I left the park.
Can't wait for exams to be over.
Labels: Life
Silicon Moulds
A relatively new thing in baking is silicon moulds. Dubbed as the next miracle material that will revolutionize baking, it's meant to be the best thing since sliced bread - it's non-stick, easy to clean and use.
Right?
In my experience, it is
not non stick. Have experienced the unpleasant task of digging out cupcake crumbs from the mould at least 3 times because I refuse to accept the fact that either the moulds don't work or I'm using silicon the
wrong way.
Frustration.
Labels: Dental School, Life
Blank
For the past few days I've just sat in front of my computer with the blogger page up with nothing to say.
Nothing.
Labels: Life
There Is A Time
After 2 of the most tiring weeks of my life I am pausing to catch my breath as I get ready for the last leg of the race, the final of all finals, the most important exam of my life - you name it.
There is a season for everything and everything is screaming to me that this is the season to
study. No time to waste daydreaming, worrying about various inconsequential things or just plain doing nothing.
My ways of procrastinating are predictable. I will
1. Blog.
2. Daydream about what I will do once exams are over.
3. Eat all the contents of my fridge because I need 'nutrients'.
4. Sleep because I need 'rest'.
5. Paint my nails because I need to 'feel good'.
No more excuses. One massive file of Perio notes waiting for me to befriend it.
Labels: Dental School, Ramblings
Piano Lessons
Was talking to a friend from back home, reminiscing about the times when we were young and carefree. Specifically, our times with our music teacher.
My music teacher lived just down the block from my house - perhaps a 3 minute walk. The atmosphere of her home was delicious - the air was scented and everything was so clean and ...
nice. Anyway, for practical classes if I practiced really hard she would tell me to go into the side room and pick out a sticker from the sticker box so she can stick it on the page as a reward. That gave me great pleasure - amazing how such small things could mean so much when one is young.
And theory classes... we would study together on her dining table and being the children that we were, there would be a lot of kicking each other under the table. I distinctly remember one of my friends behaving so badly that he was told to stand in a corner. And I bet he's reading this blog now burning in shame. At least, he
should be burning in shame!
Anyway, they were happy times. All these memories came rushing back perhaps also after playing piano here after a long absence from it.
I miss it. A lot.
Labels: Ramblings
Roots, Begone!
After getting increasingly aggravated because my roots were unsightly due to my rather light hair colour, I finally put an end to that agony by getting my hair colored back to my original hair color. Yes, that would be black.
Now that that's done, I can now study in peace. Or can I?
Am currently addicted several songs, including:
1. All The Love In The World - The Corrs
2. Breathless - Shayne Ward
3. Teardrops On My Guitar - Taylor Swift
Yes, I am feeling a tad emotional for some reason.
Labels: Life
